Jessica Biel..Is she or isn't she?

That question has every tabloid foaming at the mouth. I think she is  pregnant and has chosen to only share the information with her close friends and family. I commend her for that. Unlike so many we see on TV  Biel has real talent and career isn't based on how many children she can push out. Biel is a true entertainer not Tori Spelling, The Duggar or Bates family whose career has been based on childbirth and exploiting the children. To be fair when Spelling's daddy was alive she did have a career because of Daddy and a lifestyle most dream about but now she is grasping for straws to remain visable.
Biel and Timberlake have tried to keep their relationship private, so it should be no surprise that they have chose to not confirm this. The pregnancy isn't a red carpet event or a way to promote a movie, it is their private life. Again their careers exist because of actual talent not childbirth. I wish them a long , happy marriage and happy family.

♡The A-List celebrities who keep their private lives out of the spotlight are more than likely to have longer marriages than those who seek the exposure. ♡

Add another Diagnosis To My List

I had my 3 month checkup yesterday and most of my vital signs were crazy low. My tempature was 96f (98.6 is normal). B/P 78/52 , the nurse ended up checking in both arms. Hypotension! I am curious to see if this is a one time event or the beginning of heart disease. My oxygen has decreased also possibly because my heart is beating slower. I have had a nasty cold for weeks and this may be the result of the cold. I hope it is the result of the cold and nothing more serious.

Random Blogs are just my thoughts

My blog is my thoughts and nothing more than that. I do not claim to know the people I blog about.

Recently a parady blog was used by a tabloid to start a vicious rumor about Jessa Duggar's first kiss with her husband. Had the tabloid read earlier entries he/she would have seen that this person was out of her mind and had no personal interactions with the Duggar family. The people who comment were followers of this particular blog and most likely didn't know the family either. But their lies were taken at face value and repeated. Hurtful words turned Jessa and Ben's first kiss into something dirty.

I can understand the reason why they chose to share their first kiss in private. Most of us get to kiss our partner/spouse in private and until that moment they had been denied privacy, why not allow them these precious moments? I could make all kinds of crap up about the family but I choose to share my thoughts on well known family facts.

Ben and Jessa Seewald

Jessa and Ben married today, happily they bucked tradition and did things their way. Jessa wore a beautiful gown that was blush in color. The bodice although modest was stylish , no major alterations was done to distort the designers creation. Ben's suit was not my taste but it showed his personality.

They chose to write their own vows to eachother, instead of saying the generic vows most people use. My husband and I used the generic vows 23 years ago, if we do a vow renewel on our silver anniversary I plan to write my own vows.

Ben and Jessa chose to have their first kiss in private. Good for them! It was the first time they were allowed to be alone and didn't want to have a crowd of people witness their first intimate moment. Most couples have their first kiss in private and not in front of 1000 people.

They chose not to have a wedding cake but ice cream sundaes instead. Why not? It was their wedding.

I am not sure if they did a similar marriage license as Jill and Derick though. Honestly nobody goes into a marriage knowing they might eventually get divorced.

Although I don't agree with their lifestyle I wish them happiness.

Duggars

One Duggar daughter (Jill Dilliard) is married, with her first baby due months before her first anniversary and the next will marry on Nov 1 . Jessa will most likely be expecting her first baby soon after her wedding. By this time next year Jessa and Jill will be mothers with Jill possibly expecting her second. Anna Duggar will most likely be expecting also, her fourth. This is the reality of the Duggar daughters and the Quiverfull movement. Women are second class citizens in their house expected to take care of the house, have as many babies as possible and submit to their husbands sexual demands. Once their daughters are 6-7 they will start helping raise their younger brothers & sisters. By time they are 13-14 most of the chores, cooking, raising & educating their siblings is handed off completely to the daughters. For this reason I pray Jessa and Jill's first few offspring are male so they can have a better chance to be children. I am in no way saying children shouldn't help out but children should not be expected to raise their siblings because mom & dad continue to keep having kids that they are unable to care for themselves. Children should be allowed to be children. A child  having adult responsibilities put on them should be considered abuse. Jill is 23 and has been raising children since she was 7, Joyanna was her first responsibility. This is all she knows and will ever know. Out of all of the Duggar kids Jill is most like her birth mother. Michelle was an incubator not a mom. The girls were taught to have a Servants Heart and that is exactly what they are is SERVANTS.

I wish the Duggars would realize they can raise and educate the children in the real world and still be Christian. One of our close family friends raised her children to believe and serve God. Their kids were allowed to attend public school, play sports, work part time jobs and just be kids. Our friend trusted her children and knew her children might make mistakes but also felt if she raised her children right they would make good choices. None of her children drifted away from God or became criminals. Her eldest son is a Dr with a wife and two kids. Her second son is a Physical Therapist. Her youngest son is a Nurse that married after College and has a son. The youngest child goes to a University, lives on campus and she comes home when she can. Her sons chose their spouses and dated. They were allowed to live a real life. Our friend raised her children with her husband of 30+ and ran a business. Her devotion to God remains strong. She taught her children to serve God. My parents raised us to serve God also.

I am hoping some of the Duggar children speak up and say, " Although I want to continue serving God, having a bunch of children is not for me. " Maybe a daughter will say I want to be a real nurse, not a midwife or I can better serve God by becoming a Dr to care for his children.

Yes more Duggar

I know I promised to not write about the Duggar family until the next engagement but I feel once the show resumes and we have had the privledge of watching the last wedding another engagement will be announced. Perhaps Jessa is already engaged or another courtship is beginning. I sure hope its Jana so she can escape from the fold and that her potential mate isn't completely immersed in the cult.

The ATI is a CULT, a CULT that is operating openly and people need to wake up.  I am not some heathen who doesn't believe in God. I believe in God and I was raised in the Baptist church. My parents along with other friends hired their own minister and they broke away from a very large church to begin their own. Our childhood was NORMAL for the eighties. Yes we were expected to act decently and we followed the 10 COMMANDMENTS but we were given freedom to make some of our own decisions and were not enslaved by our parents. ATI demands that it's members follow strict guidelines and the children have it worse.

CULT CULT CULT CULT CULT CULT

The thing that screams Cult the most is the Church's total control of it's congregation. Parents are encouraged to homeschool their children and pretty much limit their contact with the outside world or the influence of the outside world by controlling internet access and removing television from the home.

In my opinion the families are denying their children life by pounding biblical teaching in their heads but not allowing them to experience life to strengthen their own devotion to God. The problem isn't homeschooling though although it does stunt their emotional growth and maturity. It begins with sheltering the kids 100% of the time and not allowing interaction with kids not involved with the ATI. One of my own friend' s son was being homeschooled but they made a point to get him involved in 4H, various sports such as baseball & basketball, horseback riding etc. But he was also taught Science which is hardly taught to kids in the ATI. The parents knew the importance of allowing him the oppurtunity to interact with other children. My friends are Pentecostal and have since enrolled him in a Christian School where his Mother is a teacher. Even my own Nieces and Nephew were educated in a private Catholic School. One of my nieces is studying to become a pediatric Nurse at a State University besides working a full time job at Hallmark. Without a knowledge of Science her choices would if been limited. The ATI removes career choices for women because they are expected to Marry and have alot of children.

The thing that concerns me the most about the ATI is the ALERT ACADEMY.

17 and 18 year old boys are  given Military Type Training that the parents pay for to strengthen Brain Washing? It almost seems ridiculous that most people overlook the potential threat of the ATI training their own Military. In the 90s when the Branch Davidians purchased weapons the ATF and FBI responded. We all know about WACO and what  happened.

Who's next?

Hopefully Jessa and Jana will be the next to Marry. I feel sorry for Jana, the forgotten Duggar, because she isn't doing much to get noticed. I read an article that listed the Duggar children except Jana was excluded. She's the second born Duggar, the first daughter but her life took a back seat to the others while she was raising and educating her younger siblings. Once the eldest four daughters get married more responsibility will fall on Joy-Anna unless Jana ends up a spinster or no suitable spouse comes forward that meets the parent's approval to allow Jana to have her own family. But that would also make Michelle step up and be a parent. So poor Jana might be destined to be her siblings caregiver.

This is my last Duggar post until the next engagement.

Duggar Lifestyle ♡♥ my opinion

After reading numerous pages I am surprised my opinion about the family is not unusual. It almost seems Cult Like, and in another way it gives people hope in a world turned to shit. Ironically technology has made the world smaller and us all neighbors but it also put evil in our own backyards waiting for a door left cracked open to slip in. If this technology was available 30 years ago would we have got hope from the Branch Davidians? The Duggar family use technology but at the same time don't embrace it. The children have the internet for school work but any activities online is very monitored but I can't blame the family for that with pedophiles looking for naive targets the Duggar children would be at risk.Text messages are monitored. Watching television doesn't happen and if it does the parents control what is seen. I've never really noticed a TV in their Arkansas home but Josh has a large TV in DC, I seriously doubt it's allowed to collect dust.

The family embraced technology when Josie was born because of monitors and other equipment she is alive today. They don't embrace science but without trained Physicians and nurses Josie wouldn't be here. Millions prayed for her but in reality science saved her. It is my hope that some of the children will attend an outside college and learn about science and how they can still be devout Christians without rejecting the unknown. The curriculum the children were taught had very little emphasis on Science. To me science would of opened up better career options for the children. The girls were taught from a young age to be wives and mothers, to serve God and their husbands.  Their full potential may never be realized because they are being taught to be subservient to their husbands . In a perfect world we would all be stay at home wives and mothers. I've been married 23 years and worked outside of the home 14 years plus 4 years of college. I would have very little say so on important issues.

As harsh as my opinion was about the Duggar family they have the same BIBLE I do. They choose to adhere to the biblical teachings through a slightly different interpretation than what I learned and they choose to associate with like minded individuals. The Duggar family do visit areas that have a lot of poverty but at home they only invite like minded individuals. Why? I have noticed the girls are using cosmetics more and their clothing seems more modern, skirts shorter. Their clothes seem more fitted, hair and makeup less dowdy looking. I thought vanity was a sin but the girls are trying to appear more attractive to members of the opposite sex.

So many of the children are old enough for courting. Perhaps that is the reason for changing their personal appearances. It's fascinating knowing the girls experience some of the same problems girls experience in the real world even though they have spent less time in society and didn't have the same pressure for perfection or trying to fit in. The media plays a big part in how we see beauty but the Duggar girls didn't have that perception.

Courting is dating with a purpose and saving the physical aspect of the courtship for marriage. Each one of their firsts are for their husband and their husband only. I agree with a getting to know a potential spouse before marriage and sex. I am sure the divorce rate would be greatly reduced if not non existent. Growing up in the 80s girls were pressured into getting in relationships by middle school and had sex during high school. I am no exception. I wish I would of waited. Even today teens not in relationships are called gay so many get into relationships to avoid that stigma.

Living life Duggar Style Part 4

After a few more of the children get married I expect to see big changes in the Duggar household. Michelle will lose a few of the BiBs (built in babysitters) so she will be forced to actually participate in the younger children's lives. Time to step up and be a parent Michelle. I'm sure she's more involved with the children's lives and not what's depicted on the television, I hope she is anyways. I'm sure she's a good mom but as a viewer that's something I've yet to see.

My hopes for the other children is for them to have the opportunity to spend time outside of the home without a chaperone or parent closeby watching. Experiencing the real world will not make them less Christian. It might give them opportunities to make choices on their own and sometimes they might make mistakes but how they deal with making mistakes is what really matters. Learning to make choices on their own and accepting the consequences of making a mistake will better prepare them for the real world.

My own Mom was brought up in a large family similar to the Duggars, my grandfather was a Wesleyan minister. I am sure it was difficult for my grandparents to allow my mom to attend college 200 miles away but they trusted my mom to make her own decisions . I was brought up attending church 2-3 times a week so I'm not some heathen questioning their parenting style. My parents allowed us to make our own decisions as long as we accepted the consequences because if we were raised right bad choices were few & far between but they did happen occassionly. Nobody is perfect and we all sin differently. How we learn from our mistakes is what makes us human.

Living Life Duggar Style part 3

My hope for Jill and Derick's marriage is a love that continues to grow as the union strengthens. Since Jill's world has been small and protected, I hope she experiences everything she has been denied. That she experiences the beauty of life and learns to appreciate the smaller things  or less important things in life . Because the smaller, insignificant things might have been what really mattered after all.

I hope her family size isn't as extreme as her parents so she can really know her children without expecting the older kids to take care of the young kids. The Duggars might disagree but Michelle missed out on so much of her own children's development because she taught the older kids to be BiB (built in babysitter). Sure the Duggar kids are more self sufficient but they weren't allowed to enjoy their own childhoods either. The boys had it easier than the girls which allowed them time to be kids longer.

  Most likely some of the children will be born overseas, wherever they choose to settle. Because
Jill wants to help people but to truly help she must know how others live. Not just visit a community and leave but live amongst other cultures to see what would help them the most.

Living Life Duggar Style Part 2

I can't imagine being in a relationship that every aspect was monitored and chaperoned. Jill was introduced to Derick by her dad. They began to text and Skype with every word being scrutinized by her parents. They decided to court again the budding relationship was monitored allowing a side hug at the beginning and end of each visit. Derick and Jill weren't allowed to go anywhere without a chaperone. They got engaged and progressed from side hug to hand holding. In two days Jill & Derick will experience their " first kiss" when the MINISTER pronounces them Husband and Wife.

After the wedding and reception, Jill will experience physical love with Derick . I do believe her marriage will last because they truly do care for eachother and religion teaches us DIVORCE is WRONG. Even though I think Jill's marriage will be loving some of the others might find themselves with a domineering spouse because they are taught the patriarch of the family is always right. Will some of the girls end up living in a house where Domestic Violence is common and choose to stay in the marriage because DIVORCE IS WRONG? I know people who spent years dating and eventually marry but end up divorced because they seen a side to that person they have never known. Jill will soon learn sex is a small part of marriage and hopefully she will enjoy that part without considering it a duty as  Michelle does. Michelle thinks It's natural for a woman to submit when her husband is in the mood regardless of how trying her own day was. Making love can be enjoyable and a beautiful experience. It should never be looked at as a chore. The marital bond is established and passion between the couple should be more than trying to create a new life.

It's kind of ironic early in the show the Duggar family was compared to the Waltons. The Walton kids did date and marry . They experienced the good & the bad of life. They Duggar kids have only known the good and was told about the evil of the world. Their experiences have been limited.

Living Life Duggar Style

It seems almost surreal the fourth child of Mr & Mrs Baby Maker ( Jim Bob)  Duggar will be walking down the aisle for her own uterus festival very soon. Jill and Derick will tie that knot to begin their own family together. Like her own parents, Jill is very much in love and is allowing God to decide how many children they will have.

Although I agree with that belief and many of the family's ethics, I do believe Jill is going into a world unprepared. A world that she wasn't allowed to participate in without supervision. Or even allowed to witness from the sidelines. A world that goes against everything she's been taught.

Honestly the children have been sheltered from the time of their births. They have traveled the world with their family but never explored their own town without a chaperone. Jill was never allowed to go to a movie with friends, attend school, hang out at a mall, dance or a lot of other things we take for granted. Swimming in a private pool required modesty wear, imagine trying to cool off in a pool and you are covered up. The simplest things that make us human because we were allowed to make mistakes and we LEARNED, the Duggar children never experienced.

Her life was lived surrounded by family and never allowed to be her own person. Michelle's  own childhood was quite different than the one forced on the children. Michelle was allowed to dress the way she wanted to dress. She attended school, ballgames and was a cheerleader. She got to participate in life!

She chose to start learning about religion.

She chose to work a part time job.

She chose to Date Jim-Bob. They didn't COURT, Jim-Bob and Michelle DATED. They hugged, kissed and held hands before the wedding. The physical contact before marriage apparently didn't ruin their relationship.

She chose to quit cheerleading.

Michelle had a CHOICE. In a way the Duggar family is similar to a CULT since every aspect of the children's life is controlled. I applaud a couple of the kids who CHOSE to do their own thing, off the camera. People condemn Scientology for controlling their members but we turn a blind eye to what we witness on TLC with the Duggars.

Being the 4th oldest child, Jill learned to be a MOM because she was a BiB ( built in babysitter). She learned to clean her jurisdiction and encouraged her "buddy" to do their chores. She learned to cook for a large family. She learned to teach her younger siblings when she was homeschooled herself.

Three years ago Jill blogged wanting to be a NURSE but she became a midwife instead. Why?

My theory is Nursing school is normally not done at home and requires a knowledge of SCIENCE. The homeschool curriculum the Duggar family uses has very little SCIENCE since the main emphasis is on religion. Jill would of had to learn things that went against what she has been told her whole life. She may of understood the world better and the real miracles medical professionals preform everyday.

I do commend the Duggar family homeschooling their children though but feel they should of encouraged outside activities also like 4H, Girl Scouts, sports and Boy Scouts to allow them to experience life outside of the house. Their views of the world is very one-sided because allowing them to see other point of views might have derailed their teachings. If their beliefs are truly strong it should not matter where they live or who they associate with!!!

Most of the Duggar children want to help the less fortunate but how can they help someone else in a world they don't understand themselves?

Too young for this bulls~~~

My younger cousin on Dad' s side is fighting Acute Renal Failure because of  MEDICAL MALPRACTICE. Her ordeal began 3 weeks ago when she sought out help because she had a sore toe. Like me she has Type 2 Diabetes Mellitus and like me doesn't have health insurance. The ER Dr admited her for the toe to be amputated the following morning. The next morning the surgeon decided to not amputate the toe but put her on antibiotics that would fight the infection aggressively. This was the first mistake because Faith started getting sick and having severe stomache problems. Less than 3 days after being put on the aggressive antibiotics the medication was changed and a biopsy indicated her kidneys shut down. The next day she started DIALYSIS. She has had 5-6 rounds of Dialysis, 2 biopsies that indicates the kidneys are no longer functional and in the next couple days is being moved to a NURSING HOME. She is 36.

She can spend as little as 2 weeks in the Nursing Home or months. I'm worried sick because she's too young to be going through this. It almost feels surreal a few weeks ago she was healthy but now this bullsh*t.

The bad thing is if she tries to go home medicaid will no longer pay for her dialysis and she will die. So she is essentially a prisoner in a hospital bed with no rights to decide how to live her own life  anymore or even where she will live.Dialysis is keeping her alive I realize that but it seems so unfair.

Myelogram

Oh my goodness I barely survived the myelogram but it's over. Thank God It's over.

My week started off spending time in the clinic getting four tubes of blood drawn for my admission to the hospital on Wednesday. Tuesday morning I spent time talking to the ambulatory surgery receptionist discussing past medical history and the upcoming admission. Tuesday afternoon the radiology department called to discuss the procedure details and what I could expect. I had previously researched the procedure so I would be prepared. I was asked not to take metformin the morning of the myelogram and not to take it for 48 hours after the procedure because of the risk of renal failure. The radiographic medium dye and the metformin could cause devastation if mixed on the kidneys. I obliged .

Wednesday morning I woke up a few hours earlier than I needed to , to mentally prepare myself. I showered, brushed teeth and downed a bottle of cold spring water. I wasn't supposed to drink anything after midnight but since I would not be sedated ,what the hell. (With diabetes I have perpetual cotton mouth). After being admitted in ambulatory surgery a urine test was done to check for possible pregnancy and more blood drawn to make sure it wasn't too thin. Once the last blood was drawn I was taken to xrays where an xray technician & the radiologist explained the procedure. I was transferred to the xray table, the Dr marked the areas she would be injecting Lidocaine and where the needle will be guided in to inject the dye. My back was bathed in iodine.

The Dr was going to use a fluroscope to guide the needle in. The first injection of lidocaine hit a vertebrae and by the second injection I was in tears. The third lidocaine shot & myelogram was painless. Once the dye was injected several xrays were done the pain came back with a vengeance before I made it to ct scan.   After the procedure I was in recovery for 4.5 hours with my head slightly elevated . I was ordered to take it easy for 2 days to prevent any complications such as headaches or bleeding. Hopefully I will know the results of the procedure soon.

Nervous & Scared

Last Thursday afternoon I got the " call" that said the Myelogram has been approved . The receptionist asked if she could put me on hold to contact the hospital to set up the appointment, I was thinking to myself a major diagnostic procedure could take 2-3 weeks to get an appointment. So I was surprised when it was scheduled  for 8:00 a.m. on June 11th, three days from today. I have to go in for blood test tomorrow and as long as they feel my WBC are in a normal range plus don't have a possiblity of bleeding the myelogram will happen.  I'm scared but since I have a medical background I researched the procedure because I want to know exactly what will occur. I went into an EMG clueless years ago and although not entirely uncomfortable it was upsetting not knowing. I have watched medical procedures on others and oddly enough myself without squirming. Researching procedures is something that eases my fears because I can do a mental checklist ( if not sedated) and apply a checkmark after each step is completed.

The receptionist and I discussed my medication to insure none would cause unusual bleeding. She was surprised how upbeat I was. The procedure needs done and upsetting myself won't change that but the closer I get the more worried I am about the procedure because the bad reaction I had to anesthesia during my operation. Don't get me wrong if they decide to knock me out I won't have any problem with that since  a needle will be shoved into my spinal cord. Before MRI this procedure was preformed a lot but because of the metal in me I'm forced to have the more invasive procedure. Oh Well.

Spinal Defect- Spondylolysis

One of my diagnosis after my back injury is called Spondylolysis . What's interesting is only 3-6% of the population has it. It could of been inherited or caused by trauma. In my case it was trauma. The defect may lead to other issues though such as.

low back, mid back, and neck pain

Spinal Stenosis – where the spinal canal becomes narrow and the spinal cord can become pinched; can occur in the neck or low back.

Cauda equina syndrome – a syndrome where the nerves at the bottom of the spinal cord are compressed by an intervertebral disc or mass; rare but can cause severe nerve problems.

Radiculopathy – a condition where one or more spinal nerves are compressed.

Spinal Myelopathy –

My future may be very painful but the Spondlyosis in itself is not life threatening. Only 3-6% of the world's population has this condition, very rare indeed compared to a lot of other spinal problems. It normally shows up before a person reaches 26, I was injured at the age of 27.

From the age of 18-29 ( stopping shortly before 30th birthday) I worked in long term care, I cared for the elderly and disabled. My day consisted of continuously lifting, transferring, turning, walking, and assisting my residents with their ADL ( activities of daily living). The job was strenuous and demanding, I loved it. Providing the best care possible was my priority, care I would expect my own loved ones to be provided. In a split second my life changed when transferring a lady with Alzheimer's disease who could stand with one assist, that time she didn't. To protect her from being injured I  sacrificed myself.

My left hip muscle pulled, my muscles in lower back pulled before it felt like I was kicked in my back. My disc herniated! The lady I was assisting was uninjured. I immediately filled out an incidence report, examined by the nurse and attempted to work before being sent to the ER. After a misdiagnosis my supervisor advised me to go to the clinic. I got put on bedrest and after a month of physical therapy I went back to full duty.

It took several months before a MRI and EMG was ordered. I agreed to all recommend treatment including close to 2 years PT, 8 months light duty, restricted hours, 4 epidural injections, cortisone injections in spine, bedrest and medication. Everything failed. :-(  One day during an exam with a state doctor the feeling was checked in my feet, the left foot was almost non- existent. The operation was recommended and to be compliant I had to have it.

For a long time medication has controlled my pain 50% of the time but now It's increasing again so a myelogram/ ct scan is in my immediate future. Honestly I'm scared because of the general anesthesia. Will I feel the pain as the needle is put into my spine?

Medical Update- Back

»»» DISCLAIMER«««

This blog includes detailed upcoming medical procedures regarding my back and is not for the squeamish

~~~~~~~

I seen the orthopedic surgeon last week after telling my Dr about the recurring pain that I am having in my back. I had a disc removed in 2002 and a piece of my hip bone was placed between the vertebrae . This area was stabilized with screws and plates. For several years any discomfort was controlled with mild narcotic and non narcotic  pain relievers. The surgical experience was horrible for me but it allowed the feeling to return to my left foot.

I had an excellent surgeon at Doctors West hospital in Columbus . The surgery itself took 5 1/2 hours because I had more damage then they realized and an additional 5+ hours in recovery to wake me up. Because my bowel sounds was not detectable for days after surgery I was not given food for 2 days post surgery. Doctors West discharged me 3 days after my surgery to recuperate 4 months before starting extensive physical therapy. I was 31 years old at home unable to care for myself.

The surgery was forced because I have an open claim and was recommended by a state Dr. I needed the operations because I was losing feeling in my left foot. I'm grateful that my lawyer couldn't fight this further because I would of caused myself more problems.

Several diagnostic procedures were preformed to verify the severity of the problems and because of my surgery I cannot have more MRI of the lumbar region so I will need a Myelogram, honestly I'm not frightened as much as I was with my surgery or the EMG.

During the Myelogram my legs will be tightly strapped down as I lay face down on a table. Radiographic Dye will be injected into my spine, rotated for several minutes to distribute the dye and go for a detailed CT Scan. I do believe this will be done after general anesthesia is administered. The worst part of the procedure for me will happen after the Myelogram and CT Scan. The radiographic dye will absorb into my body and my activities will need to be limited for up to 24 hours ( I will need to lie still) to not dislodge the spinal plug ( & spinal fluid might leak) otherwise a blood patch will need to be done. A blood patch is blood would be drawn from my arm and injected into spine if spinal fluid leaks. So what I'm facing is quite unpleasant but I'm not frightened.

After going into my EMG unprepared I take the time to research procedures because the unknown is more frightening to me and because of my medical background I need to know things so I can make a mental list to cross off things during the procedure. I also know this procedure needs to be done to find a way for me to handle pain thus improving my quality of life.

Having a needle shoved into my spine is scary but it's not something new to me. I've had 4 epidurals, cortisone injections and that dreaded EMG done since my injury 15 years ago.

On a positive note my Orthopaedic Surgeon worked with the Dr who did my surgery 11 years ago and was a resident at Doctors West. I live over 100 miles away from Columbus but what are the odds I would get a physician assigned to me so familiar?

Tori Spelling and Dean

Is she desperately seeking attention by broadcasting their personal issues on Lifetime? Spelling's career has focused on reality television since Daddy died and left Tori little money. Aaron Spelling was the creator of many popular shows and was super rich but when he passed away Tori inherited very little as did her brother with the bulk of the estate inherited by her mother. The first few years of their reality series was on E, a show that focused on their marriage & their children.

This particular blog is not to spread rumor or say half-truths about Tori & Dean because their personal problems are being broadcast on Lifetime So nothing is secret. The show is called TRUE TORI.

Dean cheated on Tori and entered rehabilitation to deal with his sex addiction plus other "issues". The first episode is talking about why Dean cheated and private issues that should be discussed privately. I realize the children probably know daddy isn't home anymore and their parents have problems but this show may be detrimental to the children's well-being. Bashing eachother on TV for ratings is petty. Even if Tori & Dean eventually divorce will the children be told the truth? Most likely not because it would tarnish their image of their dad but with the internet  nothing is private for celebrities especially when gossip sites exist and YouTube.
I feel sorry for the kids because of the dirty laundry being aired for all to see.

19 kids and Counting

Several years ago a family began to interest us because at that time they had 14 children and Michelle was pregnant again. Now several years later and a few pregnancies more the Duggars still entertain us but not at the expense of their 19 kids.

The Duggar family are a Christian family, self supporting, with or without the show they could pay their debts. So many of the reality families need the show to pay for a lifestyle they obviously would not have and the Duggars do not. In all fairness I will add TLC helped finish and decorate the Duggar home, the whole family did work on together for years. Even the smaller kids contributed in some way.

Another interesting fact of the Duggar family the children are never left in the care of a Nanny like the Gosselin sextuplets were. The family uses a Buddy System, an older child will assist a younger Duggar. Since my own mom was one of 10 kids , my family did the same thing. Everyone helps care for the home and property. Again like my own family. Everyone worked together.

My grandfather was a Wesleyan minister ( he also preached to a Mennonite congregation)  and raised his children according to the bible. My mom was the 4th oldest, she learned to cook, clean and take care of her younger siblings. So although this way of parenting may seem bizarre in my family it would be normal.

Michelle and Jim Bob have a strong marriage, as a result of their Christianity ,Divorce is not a foreseeable problem in the children's future. The national average for divorce in the United States is 50%. So half of all marriages will end in divorce. With the Duggars approaching relationships differently divorce isn't likely. In my own family only 3 of my grandparents 10 kids divorced so 30% ended their marriage, which is below the national average.

The Duggar children who are courting are getting to know the person and deciding if the relationship will lead to marriage before perusing any physical contact. In other words they don't date to be dating and any physical contact is saved for the wedding night.

They get to know the person over months of chaperoned conversations and get togethers to decide if a marriage will happen. Getting to know someone without sex to complicate things will ensure a solid foundation for a successful marriage. Perhaps if more of us went into relationships this way there would be less divorces and one parent homes.

Not all courtships will lead to marriage but then again you never know.

Reality Television

It's hard to believe the last decade has been all about reality TV. Whether it was a show to showcase a person's talent or lifestyle as Americans we love reality television. We turn on the tv so we don't miss a thing and TiVo our favorite shows when we need to.

As for me I enjoy shows like deadliest catch and the family reality series. I especially enjoyed "19 Kids and Counting" & "Jon & Kate plus 8". Large families interest me coming from a big family myself .
After the Gosselin family was cancelled I wondered if the show itself could of been damaging to the sextuplets since they were filmed most of their lives since birth. The Gosselin twins could escape the cameras since they attended school but the sextuplets could not escape for a few years. Every milestone of the six was viewed on TLC. Family life, vacations and the divorce boosted ratings. What should of been a private family matter was discussed on the air or in magazines.

The first time the show was stopped was because Jon Gosselin felt it was detrimental to the children's well being. The six younger children missed the production staff and the cameras. To them this was normal. In a way it reminded me of The Truman Show.

" Once a judge granted Kate Gosselin primary guardianship of the eight children filming resumed and Jon was no longer part of the show. After awhile the show was eventually cancelled. An interesting quote from The Truman Show.... Christof: We've become bored with watching actors give us phony emotions. We are tired of pyrotechnics and special effects. While the world he inhabits is, in some respects, counterfeit, there's nothing fake about Truman himself. No scripts, no cue cards. It isn't always Shakespeare, but it's genuine. It's a life. "

Who would have guessed a movie made in 1998 would resemble what our TV shows would become? To me the constant intrusion would be aggravating in itself and cause a hostile situation but it was a sad situation when the children missed this exploitation. Nobody knew that Jon was living in the apartment above the garage until his infidelity got into the tabloids. TLC had already stopped filming Jon and Kate together but the viewers were clueless. Once their problems were exposed we all witnessed the beginning of a messy divorce with each adult smearing the other parent. Another reality family may soon face divorce...the Roloff family. Matt and Amy recently announced they are no longer living in the house together although he is still living on the property. The shows themselves didn't cause the marriages to fall apart but what should be a private issue became a part of what we call entertainment.

Gone Too Soon..What about Selena?

People recently did a photo slideshow on celebrities who died young. Sadly some died of drug overdoses or suicide. What about Selena? Her career started earlier than most and she lived her life right. She wasn't out drinking and doing drugs, playing chemical roulette. She was murdered by the president of her fan club, Yolanda Sadivar (sp?), she was 23.

Her popularity amongst the Mexican community could not be denied and after the release of her album posthumously amongst many more, myself included. Why was someone who contributed so much to a few musical genre not even mentioned?

Why?

I haven't blogged much since Jessica died on Thanksgiving but I've thought of her often. My friend Libby is grieving still for the loss of her only child. Jessica was severely disabled from a birth accident that left Libby unable to have anymore children. My friend didn't complain and focused on giving her child the best life possible. After all Jessica was her child, joy and  responsibility.

Recently there was a house fire in our region in which 3 children were severely burned. Braxton was 11 and received burns on 100% of his body, he died the day after the fire. His sister Tiffany succumbed to her injuries the day after he did, she was 26 with children of her own. The third child Tre' is holding his own now but he will need years of therapies and skin grafts. The mother was injured from jumping out a 2nd story window. Braxton was a fan of the SeaHAWKS . Our region is supporting the SeaHAWKS this Super Bowl in honor of Braxton. Their story reaches past our community.

The parents have went through any parents worse fear, seeing their children buried. In the blink of an eye the Smith family lost their home, belongings and 2 of their children. Our communities became one and try to help but it may be years before the magnitude of this loss is felt.

Faith in god has helped get through hard days and our community still prays for Tre's recovery.