Addiction

Most family deals with addiction at some point and sadly my own biological family isn't exempt from this frustration and heartbreak. I'm angry at a young adult I helped raise. I'm hurt that she has put herself in this situation and I'm frightened for her. Someone who shares my genetics is a heroin addict. She's been shooting up dope. Her body is wasting away. I used to think things like this happened to other families not ours but these last few weeks has been a wake up call. I had one (step niece) in jail for heroin trafficking to support her habit. Her husband in jail for stealing to support his habit. My step-nephew for forgery and step-brother is wanted. When will this fucking stop? Now my biological niece is hooked on this shit.

WHY WHY WHY????

The day some of the family found out about her addiction my other niece had just given birth. This day should of been about joy and hope, it suddenly turned to agony, anger and despair. Our family is angry with her, we are mad as hell. We are angry she used heroin to begin with. We are angry because she has 4 small children, but their safety and wellbeing comes last. We are angry because she let M down on the day L was born. She had agreed to watch the other kids while M was giving birth unbeknownst to us that she's a junkie that has been shooting heroin. She risked 6 little lives to go get her fix, speeding on the freeway without using proper child restraints. We are mad that she left 6 small children unattended in a hot car on a hot day. We are fucking pissed she carried heroin in the car with these children driving erratically. She risked their lives to get a fix. I'm mad as hell she broke her parent's heart knowing the medical struggle her dad just suffered through. We spent 4 months not knowing if he would live or die. A week ago my brother cried like a baby for his daughter and cries daily. He's possibly the strongest man I've ever known and I draw my strength from him and my husband. They both broke down and wept.

But at the same time I scared and fearful of her future if she even has a future. Once she gets clean staying clean will be a struggle for the rest of her life. Heroin addiction is one of the most difficult things to beat. I'm scared each time she uses she is damaging her body, slowly killing herself.  We know now she's been abusing heroin, we feel so helpless. It's painful for me , that a girl I would give my life for is dying because of heroin. Will she get hepatitis or HIV from shooting up? Will she die of an overdose? Will she end up in prison or jail? Will she be a victim of a violent crime or sell her body for that next hit of heroin ? These questions are yet to be answered.

I talked to family yesterday as I was forewarned most likely she will reach out to me when she becomes homeless in a few weeks. We all decided if she's hungry we will feed her but we will not give her money nor will she or her husband be allowed to stay with any of us. Her 4 babies complicate things and we will try our hardest to keep the kids out of children services. The kids will be the true victims in this and that part is shattering my heart. It makes my blood run cold knowing her bad decision may hurt them. We don't want them in foster care or seperated. The kids don't need to be around their parents or heroin either. It's a lose lose situation for the kids until she gets clean and stays clean.

Contrary to popular belief drug abuse affects more than the person slowly killing themselves.

Besides the drug addict , family members and children are the victims.Children often end up being raised by other family members or being put in foster care.  The communities are affected because of the rise of crime. An addict without limitless resources will steal and violence will increase in neighborhoods polluted by drugs. The war on drugs may turn out to be WW3, as the causalities and dead continue to rise. I want my niece to live and not be another statistic. I want her to see her addiction affects all of us.

I recently reached out to a recovering addict I seen 15 years ago on the documentary, Black Tar Heroin, The dark End of the Street. After years of Heroin use she was able to get clean and stay clean. Her overall sobriety is tested daily, 15 years later. She chooses to stay clean for her family but most important she's staying clean for herself. She is giving other addicts hope that there is life after addiction. Over half of the people that were on the documentary have died of Heroin overdose. They were young and still had their lives ahead of them. When I first seen this documentary I never thought this level of addiction would happen in my family. I was wrong.